Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Down on the plantation we can say things like that.

One of my favorite tricks is equating any Republican action with slavery. Hillary Clinton did an admirable job the other day when she compared the House of Representatives to a plantation. Unfortunately, Hillary is a white girl, so she needs people like Eujean to lend her some cred.

My first trick is to downplay the racial angle while still mentioning it. I did this by adding an additional point; the idea that Republicans are simply mad at her for dissing Republicans:

She also described the Bush administration as one of the worst in history.

Predictably, Republicans are crying foul.


You see? It's not the plantation idea that they're upset about, it's the direct personal attack.

Next, I use some wishy-washy language while still mentioning the plantation idea. I'll emphasize the qualifying language that immunizes me from criticism:

But what did Hillary really say that's so offensive to those who see a grain of truth in her comments?


Of course it isn't offensive if you agree with it. See how clever I can be.

For African-Americans, the "plantation" analogy is a loaded reference, but she explained she meant the House was a place were dissenting voices were not tolerated and everyone was expected to follow orders from leadership even if they didn't agree.


And here we have the reason for the set-up. You see, there are a lot of bad things in the world. Charlie Sykes, for instance. But not all of these things can accurately be compared to a plantation. It's my job to dull your senses, so that when someone who I agree with tries to compare a plantation to a "lack of toleration of dissenting voices" you don't notice how offensive that statement actually is.

To be true, it would mean that one of the worst offenses of slavery was a lack of dialogue between slaves and masters, and while I'm sure that this was the case, it's really a symptom more than a cause. It's certainly not as serious as the forced labor, poor diet, rapes, murders, destruction of families, etc.

The cause was that rich, white people owned black people. The cause of the phenomenon mentioned by H.C., on the other hand, is the Democratic party's inability to win an election. In other words, democracy.

Basically, Hillary compared slavery to democracy. Some might consider that to be pretty offensive.

But she's on my side, and she's a liberal, so we should cut her a little slack.

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